As The Year Winds Down

Typically on this day of the year (December 31st), we look back and reflect on the last twelve months and look forward to the year ahead. We all have our regrets. We remember all the good times and the bad, the people who left us forever and those we wish we had spent more time with. And we resolve to change things in the New Year.

For me, 2015 has been a year full of changes, challenges and crisis (the car accident comes to mind). My pain levels have increased and my mobility has decreased. I've been separated from people and places/events that I used to look forward to. My company, Jasper Moon, is no longer generating the extra income it was and I've been struggling to make ends meet. For the first time ever, I've actually contemplated using the local food bank.

Rudy & Minoux both passed away within 3 months
of each other. I miss them both a lot.

Being a member of the 'working poor' is not a comfortable place to be in and I am forced to do without a lot...new winter boots, haircuts, etc. Many things that I took for granted before are no longer available to me, things that many would classify as essentials. Though I have never been one to covet new clothes or shoes or handbags or fancy household accutrements, I have had to learn to 'make do' with less.

What keeps me going is the knowledge that there are many in the world who are in much worse situations, in war torn countries and refugee camps, their homes destroyed and family members killed, not knowing where their next meal is coming from or if they will even be alive to eat it. I cannot imagine living under those circumstances.

I am so grateful to have a roof over my head and food in my belly. I'm gainfully employed with a steady, though meager, income. I have drug and dental benefits from work which is a major blessing and the national health program covers my basic medical needs. I have a lot to be thankful for and I try to focus on the positive.

What will 2016 bring for me? Brighter days, smiles and giggles, love and friendship...these are a few things that I hope for. A big lottery win would be nice too, or at least a raise on my paycheque. *smile* I have no idea what the future holds for me but maintaining a positive attitude through all that happens will carry me day to day.

In closing, I hope that you and yours have happy & healthy New Year in 2016. I wish you all the best!

Dance A New Dance

I used to love dancing. I used to love going for long walks in the woods. In fact, there are a lot of things that I would still love to do, if I was able.

But I'm not.

My body is failing me; not keeping up to the active mind that I have. And certainly not keeping up with my hopes, dreams and desires; all the things I 'want' to do.

I thought we did not get 'older', but were supposed to get 'better'. That's what the commercial said, right? And what about Freedom 55? What kind of cruel joke was that on a naive and unsuspecting public? *smile*

One thing that I have learned, and finally accepted, is that older is not necessarily better. Older is definitely 'different', and sometimes different can be better. But it is always different than anticipated or imagined.

Frankly, it's not what I expected at all, nor is it how I envisioned my life would be. The dream is not playing out in reality. The movies have it all wrong. People do not always live happily ever after and maybe we're not supposed to.

Those ups and downs help us to learn and grow; expands our horizons; introduces us to new concepts; brings new people into our lives; points us down a different path.

It's time for me to learn to dance a new dance; to find creative ways to add joy to my life; to venture out in a new direction; to share my love with others; to help as I am able.

So, come along and dance a new dance with me. We'll have a blast!